It's my Obsession with Death, it's crazy
It's this feeling that, here I am, alive, a human. I have breath in me but at any point, I can go.
It's this thought that I keep imagining, what would happen after I die?
And what would happen to the people that cared about me and the people that had so much plans for us?
Would people regret things that they did not say, things that they did not do while I was alive? These are things I think about when I think about dying. And I imagine also, not just me dying but people around me and how I would react.
Would I regret? Would I feel like I should have said some things, I should have done some things?
I have lost people, loved ones and there are things I wish I did, things I wish I said. Sometimes it's like, I wish I had more time but how much time is enough time?
When you think, "okay if I had the time, I could have said this, would have...wish...if...if...if only"
Why not do those things while you are still alive? So that's why I always say You Only Live Once! You only have this one life to live, this one time, this one chance to make it count. Because when you go, people would only remember you for the things you did that mattered to them: that's what counts!
My Obsession with Death is so much that I see images of people that have gone, in my dreams. It's like my safe place, my comfort place. Sometimes I wish I could go with them.
That's not a suicidal thought, it's just the consciousness that this life is going to end and I am not going to live forever.
My Obsession with Death is such that I spend hours, literally, thinking about how I will die and how people will react to it. It is not a suicidal thought, just me being obsessed about a thing till I exhaust all fantasies about it. You may think otherwise though. Am I suicidal?
I also picture my friends dying and how I would react and it brings me down sometimes. Sad, I know.
But where would we go after leaving this earth though? Whose version of the afterlife is the truth? Is there even an afterlife? It's a whole lot of thinking that can drive the average person crazy!
Obsessing over death, does that make me weirder than my normal weird? Or is being weird so normal that I don't know what normal is, outside being weird?
A melancholic I am, obsessing over a single thought till I get exhausted.
What do you obsess over? What keeps you awake at night? What do your thoughts comprise of?
Let me know in the comment section.
#obsessedwithdeath #myobsession #dsspeaks
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https://youtu.be/5Y9sTD-IjhgLet's catch up, my social media handles:
IG: @princess_mumaral
Twitter: @dsspeaks3
Facebook: @dsarts
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